“Pain + reflection = progress”
Ray Dalio
One of the harshest feedback I have heard from a boss is, “Wag puro satsat. Aksyon aksyon din” (Don’t be all talk, actually practice what you preach) It was a harsh yet much needed wake-up call then, for which I am grateful.
Nevertheless the leaders whose words really inspire me and push me to greater heights and that which I look back on up until now and still get inspired, are words of encouragement and trust, words of undeserved praise, especially during the times I look down on myself and doubt my abilities. Their words are sweet honey to my soul, they make me want to believe in myself as they see something that even I did not see in myself then.
To the extent that you can, please be the latter kind of leader, as much as you can. Because you never really know the depth of struggle a person may be going through, how hard they may be trying to be better but for some reason just can’t. They may seem enthusiastic and joyful on the outside, but their spirit is crushed and bleeding. You may speak the truth, but it’s truth that they most likely already know and need not be reminded of; they need encouragement more than anything because this very struggle comes from a deep dark place you do not see nor may understand.
Your words may be filled with honest truth, harsh but “for good”. But they all add up in the end and if the person has heard these harsh words from others and repeatedly from themselves (the tape they play in their mind), yours may be the final nail in the coffin that ultimately crushes their spirit. You would not want to be that.
There is a right place and time for rebuke. And always should be done out of love (wrapped in love) However, you can never ever go wrong with encouragement and compassion. That will never go out of place and much needed everywhere, every time 🙂 This world needs more compassion and kindness than “being right”
